Third Arc: Thirtieth Chapter

"Step right up, one and all! What I produce here is a magic condiment, and its name is mayonnaise! One spoonful of this, and your usual sandwich tastes completely different! Oh, you there, miss, you don't believe me?"

"Well, I've never seen or heard of any such condiment."

"Now, now, now, now, there's no harm in trying! Give it a taste!"

Scooping a spoonful of mayonnaise from the little jar opened for samples, I drizzled it over the sandwich the young lady held.

"Oh! It smells good!"

"Come, come, come, come, come, come, come! Try it, try it! See for yourself!"

The young lady, who reluctantly put the mayonnaise-topped sandwich to her mouth, opened her large sky-blue eyes wide the instant she took a bite.

"What a thing...!"

"Well, how about it, miss?!"

"This rich, creamy taste, and yet the aftertaste is never heavy. For all its mellow flavor, the touch of tartness is exquisite! It doesn't get in the way of the meat in the sandwich, no, it draws it out richer still!"

Anje, her conspicuous pink hair hidden, held the mayonnaise high, spun a turn, and declared,

"Mayonnaise! This is the supreme condiment!"

Anje. That's too much.

Hello, everyone! It's Cosette! For the past several days we have been running mayonnaise demonstration sales from morning on, without a break. With Anje, dancing with mayonnaise in hand, as my assistant. An assistant by the name of "plant." Her food reviews are so good they're a little off-putting.

And, how to put it, was Anje maybe Indian or something in her past life? She's somehow pulling the people around her in and turning it into a musical.

Drawn in by the dancing Anje, perhaps, the mayonnaise was selling like hotcakes. But I did not miss that among the people crowding around the mayonnaise was the person I had been waiting for.

"Saaambaaa! Olé! ...Ma'am! Sell me some mayonnaise too!"

"Right you aaare! Oh, aren't you the little cook who bought some the other day too? I'm so glad you've taken such a liking to it."

"I'm completely hooked on mayonnaise! I'd love to have our head chef try it, even..."

At those words I whipped my head around, and the boy, who looked a lot like Pete, the kitchen apprentice back home, flinched and stepped back.

"Is that so?!"

"Uh, well, yeah..."

"Ohh, I'm so pleased! You're a cook at some house of note, aren't you? I could tell right away!"

"Y-you think so? Heh heh!"

The boy, embarrassed, was saying, do I really give off that kind of aura, must be my skill showing through and all. But forgive me, boy. This auntie can't tell any such thing. I just knew from the start.

This boy was a kitchen hand at the mansion of Elliot's mother, Lady Lyonetta. Knowing he often came to the shopping street to buy supplies, I had been timing our demonstration sales to match, every time.

"Well, well, a cook from a great house really does know good taste! There we go! A man who knows the difference!"

"Ah ha ha! Oh, stop! Though maybe... that's true?!"

No, it isn't. He's a kitchen hand to begin with, but he probably doesn't do any cooking.

"You know, I'd love to see a great house's kitchen just once. Oh, I know! If you gave the head chef some mayonnaise, wouldn't that raise your standing, young man?"

"Y-you think? My standing... would it go up..."

"No doubt about it! Here, I'll tell the head chef myself, good and proper, what a fine palate you've got!"

"R-really? Then maybe I'd move up from kitchen hand to... no, never mind. Th-that's it! I'll introduce you to the head chef!"

Hooked! Certain of victory, Anje and I quickly traded a glance.

"Oho! So this is the famous head chef! A pleasure to meet you!"

"Oi, Peter! Who are these people?"

"Ch-Chef! I, I wanted you to taste a magic condiment today! These people are selling it, and I found them!"

Led by the kitchen hand, Peter, Anje and I had come to the kitchen of Lady Lyonetta's mansion. Of course, both Anje, who had played the plant so well, and I were decked out in auntie costumes. Still, I am a true-born noble young lady. I had been on edge about whether my innate grace or bursting youth might spill out, but ever since we started the demonstration sales in disguise, days had passed with no sign of being found out. Well, then again, on the inside I am a seasoned, bona fide auntie. Before my heartfelt acting, even a noble's grace had no choice but to stay hidden.

"Lady Cosette, your age in your past life was... no, never mind."

After who knows how many demonstration sales, Anje muttered something under her breath. Did she have something she wanted to say?

Back to the story. To infiltrate Lady Lyonetta's mansion, I was disguised as a wandering cook and Anje as my apprentice. The head chef, with his stern face and fearsome look, eyed us up and down suspiciously, but he was not frightening in the least. Why? Because our own head chef's face is far scarier. Truly, our household's facial weapon is in a different class.

"Magic? Don't give me that rubbish! You lot are those peddlers who've been the talk of the town lately, aren't you?"

"You've heard of us! Oh, what an honor! It's a condiment as delicious as magic! We did so want a famous cook like yourself to give it a try, Chef!"

"Famous...?"

The chef's cheek twitched at the blatant flattery. Had I overdone it? He wasn't going to be as easy as the kitchen-hand boy, of course.

"A-a-am I really that famous?"

"Huh? Yes! Of course!"

"I see, I see! Heh! Hff hff."

Correction. The head chef was a pushover.